One of my favorite satires is The Screwdriver Letters, an epistolary novel by Narnia writer CS Lewis. It consists of a message from a fat elder demon to his nephew on how to properly cleanse the soul of an unsuspecting human. It’s a claustrophobic message of managerial politics and nepotism, with World War I taking place in the background. A real pick-up line. Sintopia is a two-shot embodiment of this premise – in other words, brighter, breezier, and definitely more slapstick than Christian. It puts you in charge of a world divided between Earth and Hell and challenges you to ensure a constant flow of optimally sinful souls between the two. Pray and watch the trailer.
The French creators of Piraknights describe themselves as “part pirate, part knight”, but I think they’re lying. In all the years I’ve been doing this, I’ve never heard of pirates and knights teaming up to make a video game. No, I don’t agree that it’s a joke. Similarly, I can’t believe that Team 17, which publishes the game, only has 17 people working for it. This is all some devilish deception – a classic Screwtape ruse. The only thing we can trust here is the press release with the announcement, which states:
Sintopia is a combination of a builder game and a God game, with an asymmetrical loop. On OVERWORLD, the influence of the stupid civilization of the chickpea people is taking its toll on the world, and unfortunately for them, they condemn themselves by committing a multitude of sins. Punish dead souls, keep receipts and generate profits that will assist you build and maintain your hellish empire.
It’s challenging to get an true feel for how the game is going, but this seems like a fun take on the basics of management simulation. An additional wrinkle is that you don’t want said people to get the chickpeas too sinful because it will give you explosive indigestion in hell (I have a weakness for chickpeas and can attest that this is risky). “Make sure your souls undergo effective ‘re-education’ to avoid the accumulation of sins over many lifetimes,” the press release warns. “No one wants to face the demonic invasion that will inevitably result from too much corruption in the world.”
There doesn’t appear to be a store page for Sintopia yet, but you can read a little more about it official game website. The game will be available in early access in 2025.
