Since the super-powered Patch 7 for Baldur’s Gate 3 dropped yesterday, PC gamers have naturally delved into its modern features—especially those extra bad endings. As it turns out, some of them are the kind of emotional rollercoaster that even the most hardened Durge can’t handle without feeling something. That said, the biggest disappointment has been reserved for people who love a certain bard.
If you want a full rundown of what the patch notes include, the full patch notes are out now, you should check them out here . It’s also out now on PC, but you’ve still got a bit of catching up to do if you want to play on console or Mac.
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Warning: The following contains major spoilers for Baldur’s Gate 3 and its modern endings.
So, since the patch went live, people have been testing out the modern endings and have been left either in awe or with earnest emotional damage. In the first camp is Bad ending Karlachwhich has rightly been described as “absolutely metal” and in which the artist delivers a wrestling speech to the denizens of Baldur’s Gate before summoning demons and ripping her own heart out.
It’s your favorite golden retriever without any of the slack, and her voice actress Samantha Béart responded to people loving the show by shouting out praise to the script and directors, as well as saying they’ll be doing one fan’s response to the scene, which ended with the words “fuck, my dick is hard.”
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There are also endings where you kill people like Shadow of the Heart AND Gale and have them utter unforgettable last words before they plummet into the abyss, in which both “I… thought we’d save each other” and “You made me want to live” make people at home do the same thing they fall to their knees in the supermarket.
However, the biggest disappointment seems to be saved for those who thought Larian was joking in the community updates that the patch would make Alfira a full-fledged perma-companion or change her fate in Dark Urge matches. Unfortunately, Larian wrote in the patch notes: “We recall that we explicitly stated in Community Update #28 that if you play as Dark Urge, a certain bard will be able to join your party as a controlled character in the camp if there is a spot available, TEMPORARILY.
“It seems some of you have not understood what we are putting off. There are no new companions. There is only death.” Oh. As you can see from People saying things like “I’m sure someone will find a way to break the game and stop it” and “Those evil bastards at Larian love to twist the knife”, Alfira support takes it quite well.
