“After all, winners take drugs” – with this fun tool you can rewrite the screens of your favorite games

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Feel like getting pissed off with video games? There you go, a fun little tool that you can easily run in your browser that lets you rewrite famed gaming quotes. Death Generator offers a gallery full of (mostly) retro games and a straightforward text box that replicates the exact font used in those games, all designed to make the little shopkeeper in Zelda say rude words or completely rewrite the documentation before Goldeneye 007’s mission. But there’s a lot more. I have done a lot, come see what I mean and try it yourself.

You can play around with the warning from the FBI, which famously told every arcade visitor in the United States (and beyond) that “Winners don’t do drugs.” You can have some fun with Dracula’s existentialism in Castlevania: Symphony Of The Night. Or reimagine the letter Princess Peach sends to her plumber buddy in Super Mario 64.


Image source: Rock paper shotgun/FBI

The
Image source: Stone paper shotgun / Microsoft / Karl Marx

In Super Mario World, a message appears calling for Mario to
Image source: Rock Paper/Nintendo Shotgun

Dracula is worried
Image source: Rock Paper/Konami Shotgun

But my favorite is probably Metal Gear Solidbecause it not only allows you to re-type the conversation text using a codec, but also allows you to customize the person participating in the conversation. You can make up conversations with Otacon, Mei Ling, the Colonel, Meryl, and Naomi – it even lets you choose how many pick-up bars appear. The attention to detail is admirable.


Otacon and Snake talk on the codec, and Otacon shouts that Snake has mistaken the disguised melon for a human.
Image source: Rock Paper/Konami Shotgun

You can also just type in a low phrase and press the cube button to randomly switch screens and see how your words would fit if, say, Sub-Zero was saying them. Or maybe you weren’t cheerful with the way Bloober Team remade Silent Hill 2, in which case you can start the process of writing your own adaptation, starting with Mary’s famed letter to her caring husband.


He reads a letter on a black background
Image source: Rock Paper/Konami Shotgun

And finally, no collection of famed gaming screens would be complete without this scene from Call Of Duty: Advanced Warfare, which I left untouched and recreated here in its original, unaltered form, you know, out of respect for the fallen.


A funeral scene in Call Of Duty was obscured by a disturbing existential text.
Image source: Rock Paper Shotgun / Activision

The tool was created by developer “Foone” who released it on Bluesky. “I already have 270 games and I’m constantly adding more,” they wrote on the social media site. “The latest one is the GBA Kingdom Hearts game, Chain of Memories. This one is cool because it’s full of Disney characters.”

The coder then published the post an image of a cursing Winnie the Pooh. Perfect. Go and see if you can beat it, readers. Have fun!

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